Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Missed Connections 1

    Do you remember me? I was the slightly overweight (my doctor claims I'm obese) Caucasian male in the Tap Out shirt and JNCO shorts. I was shopping with my mom and she was asking me what vegetables I would be willing to eat -rather loudly I might add- while I played Angry Birds on my phone at the produce section of the Payless grocery store on Greenbush.
   You were the skinny girl with the bleach blond hair at the deli counter. You were wearing a Rue 21 halter top with spaghetti straps and  low waist jeans with elaborate sequence embroidered on the back pockets. I could see your leopard printed thong. You were holding a carriage with your left arm sagging toward the ground. You baby was screaming as you talked loudly on your cell phone about how your period had been different since you had Jed. The deli clerk looked on blank faced while you chatted.
    At one point you looked over toward me and my mom. I didn't look up because I was about to drop a bomb bird in just the right place to completely destroy the structure in the game. But I saw you look my way. Is it just me or did we make a connection?
    If you feel the way I do please contact through Facebook, publicly or not, or email me at blahblahblah@gmail,com, or text me from the phone number I will send you if you send me an email that says you would like my cell phone number, or call me at home from this number, 555-555-5555, but please do not call after nine because my mom gets upset if people call after nine (even though it only happened once when I was in high school and I am a strong-willed man now, in my mid-twenties.)
     I hope to hear from you.

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